The one thing I learned from working retail and fast food is what job I don’t want to have the rest of my life.

Don’t get me wrong—props to the people who do. I just can’t do it. The main reason why is my mouth.

Those jobs are the kind where if you blink at customers wrong, they will tear you a new poop hole. They will clear the rest of their schedule to ruin your job. They will ask to see your boss, try to find out where you live. Demand a list of your fears. All that.

Thankfully, I have an outlet here, where I can be as mouthy as I want. It’s encouraged, actually.