Family and festivities are great, but the one thing I look forward to the least for Christmas is knowing what to say or do when someone gives me a present I don’t actually want.

Like, I know deep down in my soft, caring millennial heart that I should be grateful for anything, and there are people who have nothing in the world…but in the moment that my father’s cousin’s son’s former roommate gives me a sweater for a cat I don’t even have…yeah, it gets tough.

I feel like I’m already rehearsing acting lessons for my face so that I can convince everyone how pleased I am with the cat sweater. The catsweat. The sweatcat.