Peacocks need to f*ck off.

Seriously, who do they think they are, strutting around with that giant plumage in the air. It’s like 17 times their body size.

And what is it for? Having sex. Freaking horny dude peacocks just trying to slip into the good graces of a dainty (if much less pretty) peacock.

And what the hell is that, having the dude peacocks prettier than the female peacocks? That’s confusing.  It makes me not want to wear make up anymore. Thanks a lot, society.


(And yes, I realize female peacocks are peahens, but who knows that who reads my blog? We’re just all happy we put our legs into the correct pantholes this morning.)