I don’t understand why some foods can be named after their color and some can’t.

Take an orange, for example. What a lazy way to name a piece of fruit. Sure, but when I call a watermelon a “green,” you look at me weird and wonder where I’m hiding my pills.

Under my pillow, thank you very much.


I’m just saying, let’s have some consistency here. I propose now calling an orange a “juicy flesh balloon,” and if you don’t like that name, you’re not classy enough to be on my wavelength.