Forget elves who make cookies and shoes. All I want is an elf who will go out and scrape my car windshield for me in the winter.
That way, I can keep my lazy ass indoors where it’s warm and sip my Godiva hot chocolate while thinking about all the peasants I’ll chuckle at while sitting on my luxurious yacht. I may even feast on that fancy caviar, the kind that comes from sturgeon who have only been force-fed Lucky Charms since birth.
Or maybe I’ll just go out and scrape my own car.
How about an elf that makes your Godiva hot chocolate and THEN goes out to scrape the ice off the car?
Dream big!
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