Oops. I was eating veggies and dip at work and I spilled some dip on my pants.

Quandry: do I wet wipe it up or leave it there? Do I look like a hobo who peed herself or a gluttonous pig who can’t shovel food into her mouth fast enough?

Peeing hobo or gluttonous pig. Hobo pig. Hobo pig.

I ended up compromising and just took my pants off. Half the genders likely won’t mind.